This is Part 1 of my meal planning series
Nobody tells parents-to-be the commitment involved in feeding a family. Once my daughter started eating regular meals and snacks, I panicked because I realized I’d be doing this for the next 17 years. Three meals and two-to-three snacks, day in and day out.
So each week I’d tell myself I “should” get to meal planning but always put it off. I did such a poor job that I’d run back to the grocery store all week long. You see, even though I’m a dietitian I never learned how to cook for a family. Not only was I lacking confidence, I felt like I just wasn’t born with the gift of cooking.
Thankfully, I changed my attitude, got organized, and now find great satisfaction in the whole process (although it’s nowhere near perfect). But nothing was going to work until I overcame my barriers.
Welcome to Part 1 of my Meal Planning Series. Before digging into the mechanics of meal planning, take time to consider what may be holding you back from feeding your family the way you want to.
1. The time factor
In our recent survey, many parents said that time is a barrier to planning and preparing meals. Maybe you work long hours or have a high-needs child that doesn’t allow for free time. Or maybe it’s something else.
Whatever it is, dig a little deeper to see if time is really a red flag for something else. Maybe you don’t feel confident preparing meals for your family. Or maybe you’re less than thrilled with the way your dinners turn out. And if it is because of your busy schedule, stay tuned because this series will give you plenty of ideas on how to make meals happen without taking a lot of time out of your day.
2. Expecting perfection
I’m not a food snob. I don’t expect parents to always use whole foods fresh from their garden. It’s a wonderful thing to work towards but if you currently rely on convenience foods, or eating out, changing overnight to making everything from scratch is not realistic.
So parents may put off making meals until they have more time to cook from scratch, instead of starting where they are now. As feeding expert Ellyn Satter said in my interview with her, simply start by getting into the habit of eating together. In part 2 of this series, you’ll learn easy ways to add tasty and healthy meals to your repertoire.
3. Wacky schedules
One parent works late so dinner doesn’t happen. If your kids are older they might play sports, making it hard to come home and prepare meals. Families are so busy today that dinner together can seem like an impossible feat.
Just know there are always solutions to schedule conflicts. If your husband works late, for example, see if he can come home early (and work from home if need be) one day a week and make sure the family eats together on weekends. We talk more about this in part 3 of our series: Secrets to the Perfect Weekly Meal Plan.
4. Our culture
Several years ago my husband and I visited my family in Serbia. I was amazed at how my aunt and cousin cooked breakfast, lunch, and dinner. I mean real, from-scratch meals. In their culture, feeding yourself takes priority.
But in our culture, it is acceptable to feed yourself poorly. I once talked with a woman who thought going into a store and buying a cheese stick was too much work. When I find myself complaining about going to the grocery store, I remind myself that nothing is more important than feeding myself and my family well.
5. Kids won’t eat it
There’s no doubt that coming up with meals everyone likes is a major challenge. We’ll get into this later but don’t let your kid’s picky palate hold you back from making family meals.
It’s important to remember that the dinner table is where kids learn how to eat. You can’t expect them to come there already loving a variety of foods — it takes time. Sometimes changing your outlook is all that’s needed. For more on this see How to Make Dinners More Kid-Friendly.
I know there are all types of people reading this blog. Some of you are avid cooks and others are beginners. Many of you might be meal planning already while others haven’t even thought about it. But more than anything I hope we can learn from each other so we can raise children who make feeding themselves a priority.
So I leave you with one question that you can comment about or stew over. What is (or was) your biggest barrier to getting good-tasting, nutritious meals on the table?
Next: How to Uncover Easy & Healthy Family Meals
Want more ideas on how to keep the meals coming? Check out Maryann’s book The Family Dinner Solution: How to Create a Rotation of Dinner Meals Your Family Will Love
My biggest barrier to getting healthy meals on the table is having a busy schedule and not planning ahead. If I prepped dinner the night before, or earlier in the day, I would be much more successful.
Pauline, I know what you mean. If I don’t plan ahead the week just doesn’t go well. Hopefully this series will give you some ideas on how to plan meals without taking too much time.
I love menu planning and grocery shopping and I do both weekly. My problem is that some nights if I’m leaning toward not cooking, usually my husband says he’ll just find something (usually cereal), so instead of actually cooking a good meal (already planned and shopped for), we just eat what we can find. Our little 2 year old monkey gets a balanced meal, but we don’t. How silly is that!
Have you thought about having family dinners where everyone eats the same thing? I started them when my daughter was just under 2.
I will be honest, I do not like to cook and my husband is fully aware of this but if I am going to stay home with my boys, I have to cooks for us. Going out to dinner is much more enjoyable for me but it does get expensive and going out to dinner with children isn’t always enjoyable! 🙂 My issue is how picky my children are…my oldest doesn’t like to eat meat and would much rather eat his carbs…he loves pasta, just pasta. My youngest doesn’t like to eat much either….pizza, pb/j, mashed potatoes. They do like to eat bread when we have it for dinner but we have them eat some of their dinner before eating bread, which most time doesn’t happen so they eat nothing. There are many meals where they just don’t eat and meals just become frustrating and seem futile!
Alexis,
I totally understand where you are coming from. I never learned to cook and have a picky 3-year old. I have found the crock-pot to be the best thing. It got me started cooking and is really easy. I’ve gradually added new dishes to my meals and like cooking more now that I make food that tastes really good.
As for the picky eating. I usually make two meals a week I know my daughter will eat. So one week that might be burritos and spaghetti. Other nights I make sure there are at last 2 things I’ll know she’ll eat. And after doing this for a while I see her trying more and more foods. Yes, some nights she doesn’t eat anything — even foods I KNOW she likes. I have let it not bother me and I think she can sense that. I’ll talk more about strategies in my “getting kids to eat” series. You can always have them help with preparation and find fun ways to have the try foods. Let me know if you have any questions
Reading the first two paragraphs of this post was like looking into a mirror and I realize that I’m going to have to change my attitude toward feeding my family. My barrier is an incredibly picky son (which squashes all excitement in meal preparation) and a 9 month old howling daughter that requires holding or a Bjorn during the dinner prep hour. I think of these things as I’m trying to pull together an imaginative grocery list and I frequently decide to chuck the whole idea…which sends me to the grocery store for panicked mini-shops over and over again throughout the week. Getting organized, changing my attitude and disciplining myself…guess that’s why I’m here.
Ironically I am a personal organizer so I’m great with “stuff” but not with menu planning. I get overwhelmed, have way to high expectations of myself and end up making not so great meals. I’ve decided this is the year I am going to overcome this issue and once I do, I am going to learn more about cooking healthful, fresh meals for my girls. Thanks for putting this blog together to help families like ours get out of the ‘last minute meal’ rut and into truly caring for ourselves and our bodies!
Our biggest problem is that we can’t find quick meals that everyone agrees on. We have a couple of old reliable recipes, but those get old quick. What do you do when you have limited, boring options and a hectic schedule on top of it all?
Vanessa — this post might help you. http://www.maryannjacobsen.com/2012/06/6-simple-strategies-for-pleasing-the-whole-family-at-dinnertime/
Don’t try to please everyoen every night. What kids like is always changing so by offering different things you increase the chance they’ll accept more items. Good luck!